Police have arrested an Apache Indian named Keanu Dude (real name) for allegedly setting an American flag on fire, which resulted in a 2,200-acre wildfire on an Arizona reservation. Through a process that liberals call “global warming,” officers say that Keanu Dude was spotted burning an American flag right before the blaze broke out.
The fire burned 3.4 square miles of tribal land (about 2,200 acres), destroyed 21 homes, and forced the evacuation of more than 400 members of the San Carlos Apache tribe. All that damage and destruction was allegedly caused after a 22-year-old named Keanu Dude waged a one-man protest against the American flag.
To their credit, tribal leaders do sound terribly embarrassed about the whole thing. Tribal police chief Elliot Sneezy (real name) says they haven’t determined a motive as to why Keanu Dude set the flag on fire.
Tribe Chairman Terry Rambler (real name) stated, “Arson is a senseless act that will never be tolerated under any circumstance.”
That’s kind of a fascinating statement, don’t you think? Keanu Dude is being held in the San Carlos Adult Detention & Rehabilitation Center on a single count of arson. But that’s not really what this was.
According to investigators, he burned an American flag. Burning an American flag is such a shameful act that the chief would rather call it arson. The 21 families who lost their homes only escaped with the clothes on their backs and now must try to rebuild their lives from scratch.
The good news is that the local community and people from across Arizona are donating tons of clothes and other items to help the displaced families. The moral of the story, obviously, is that you shouldn’t burn the American flag!
